- Very attractive. - Very funny.
Wonderful. Smile. Darling. Smile.
Come on. Don't be shy. There we go.
Oh, my God.
Ben.
Ben, I have stickers. L have no wallet. L think McGruff stole from me.
- Calm down, don't make a scene. - No, I have stickers, no money.
L have... Stickers.
- Isn't that Anna Foster? - Damn it.
- I have to go. - L'll talk to the manager...
I can't explain now, but thank you for everything you've done.
L have to go. L'll see you later. Thank you.
Here we go again.
- There she is. - Anna!
Pull it over.
Anna!
This way.
Gondola?
- Yes. - No.
My first customer.
The other gondolieri, they put me here, but nobody visit.
L tell them, "Nobody come to my bridge." They say, "Somebody will, Eugenio."
And now you are here.
We don't have any money.
- Well, then, I'm sorry. - But, sir, we're newlyweds.
- Right? Right, honey? - That's right, sweetums.
Precious, I just love it when you call me that.
Your love, it's beautiful.
- No money, no ride. - Sir, please.
We were married against my parents' wishes.
- We tried to stay apart, but it was no good. - Exactly, because I would rather die...
...than live another day without my lover man.
We have nothing but we have everything.
We've come so far on only the currency of young love.
If sweet stories could buy pasta, you'd be very fat by now.
Thank you.
All right. Yes.
For you, the canals are free tonight. My first cliente.
- Mama will be so proud! - On second thought...
After you, darling.
Let me remember. Where does this go?
Just kidding!
My first joke with my first customer.
We did good, huh?
L was a little worried when you went to "the currency of young love."
But apart from that, you were fairly magnificent.
- Thank you. - Pleasure.
You know, I just married you, but I know nothing about you.
There's not much to know.
Okay. Ben Calder, 23 years old.
Born in Wales and then moved to London with my mother when she left my father.
My father...
...was always at work. Never at home.
My mother wanted him to make the big gesture.
What's the big gesture?
You know, "I'll quit for you.
L'll stay home for you, darling."
But he didn't.
Because... Well, people don't really do that, do they?
L don't know what people do.
Thank you, Ben.
What for?
L couldn't have done any of this without you.
Seems to me you'd have been just fine on your own.
Amore, such a beautiful thing.
Take you back to your hotel now?
Actually, we don't have a hotel.
Newlyweds. First no money and now no place to...
To stay.
You stay at my home.
You can meet my mama. She will be so happy.
- Mama, please be nice. - Why I let you buy that crazy boat?
You were good accountant. Now you killing me.
- Mama, they're newlyweds. - Newlyweds!
- Eugenio, this is so kind of you. - You're welcome.
Tonight you are family. You must stay and celebrate.
You will sleep in Eugenio's room. It will bring him luck.
Oh, no, that's...
Change the sheets.
L want you to try some of my grappa.
Tell me your names.
Well, I'm Ben. And this is...
...Anna.
Make no mistake. America is committed to backing leaders and nations...
... that are paving the hard but rewarding path toward political and economic reform.
Okay. Let's just check with the local police.
To answer your question, no. L don't get women that way.
Haven't actually had a girlfriend since...
Let's just say that women stopped beating down my door...
...about the same time the bangs stopped covering the receding hair line.
Stop overcompensating. You're a good-Iooking...
You look fine. Some girls like a bald head.
- L'm not bald yet. - L'm just saying. You should embrace it.
Maybe you could cut it really short. Some girls like that. They think it's sexy.
So...
I'm gonna sleep on the floor...
...which means that you can have the bed to yourself.
You don't have to do that. There's plenty of room here for both...
No, no. It's fine. L prefer the floor...
...because it's just a bit...
...Iower. Which I like. You know, so...
Yeah.
Oh, come on. Don't be shy. It's our wedding night.
- Ben? - Night, now.
- Where are you going? - Anna, go to bed.
L'm trying to.
Over there.
But, Ben, we...
- We kissed... - I understand that.
And I liked it. L like you. Will you stop walking away from me?
- Anna! - You don't need to protect me.
- I know what I'm doing. - No, you don't...
Can you please stop taking your clothes off around me?
- What's wrong with you? - Anna...
...what happened on the gondola was me trying to hide you, nothing else.
- That was a real kiss. - No, it wasn't.
- I don't believe you. - It's the truth.
L told you. We're just two people traveling in the same direction.
So you didn't...
...feel anything?
No. L didn't feel anything.
So can you please just get into bed?
Naked virgin safely in bed.
Yes, sir. L understand, Mr. President.
Don't worry, we're gonna find her.
Yes, sir.
Did I mention what a ridiculous idea this was to begin with, sir?
One of your stupidest.
He hung up before any of that.
You look at this view?
Is Anna in it?
No.
Let's keep moving.
L'm not leaving this spot till you take a moment to appreciate this.
You know, it's not enough just to be a beauty, Morales.
You have to be able to appreciate beauty too.
Nice to have you back, Weiss.
L'd like to take a moment to give thanks to Anna...
...who ran from her parents, jumped a train to Venice instead of Berlin...
...thus giving us the opportunity to witness this phenomenal sight.
- Amen. - Finished?
Oh, come on.
It's hip-hop Hebrew.
You had a good night?
Yes, great. Thank you.
Thank you so much for your hospitality.
But you were very quiet. The walls is like paper, but I hear nothing.
That's just because he's repelled by me.
But it's not true.
Tell her she's a beautiful woman.
You're a beautiful woman.
And kiss her.
Come on. You want a happy marriage, you gotta kiss her every day.
It's okay. We'll work it out.
Mama, where are the car keys?
You driving with Eugenio? Better kiss her now.
- The bike, the bike, the bike! - Idiot!
Thank you, darling.
Eugenio, thank you so much for everything. L wish I had something else to offer you.
Six Million Dollar Man. It's a wonderful gift.
A beautiful couple. Take care of each other.
- Hey. - Don't touch me.
English, por favor.
That's Spanish, Weiss.
Allora, about Eugenio.
He was a good accountant. Why he buy the stupid boat...?
He was last seen with these two people.
The newlyweds.
L say we don't tell him until we have something really good to go with it.
We find her and say, "Here's your daughter. Sorry, Mr. President. She's married."
God, this is bad. It was bad before, but now it's beyond bad.
Yep. This is pretty much as bad as it gets.
Now you touch me?
- They just crossed the Austrian border. - Weiss and Morales are en route.
No contact with Calder since yesterday.
Enough. L want a full contingent at that Love Parade.
- Jim, how could you let this happen? - I don't know. It happened.
Sir? There's one more thing.
What else?
We think they're married.
So, what is it? Do you have a girlfriend? L mean, is that who you called yesterday?
No, no girlfriend.
Okay, well, if you didn't like girls, you could've just said something to me.
Hey, listen, I like girls.
Oh, okay. So you're just not attracted to this one.
No, that's okay. This whole time I felt alone because I never had any opportunities...
...because I never had privacy, but thanks for proving me wrong. L needed that.
Anna, believe me, this is not about you.
Romance is simply not...
...a feasible option for me right now.
Oh, God. Kill me now. L can't even attract some guy who says stupid things like:
"Romance is not a feasible option"?
You know what? The joke is on you, my friend.
L was just kidding last night. L would never go through with it.
Of course you wouldn't.
No! Stop!
Anna, don't.
Anna. Anna.
Oh, come on.
Bye-bye.
Unbelievable.
Good luck.
Shit.
Hi, I just... Guten tag. That's the extent of my German. L really need the bike.
He's gonna jump. No, no, no! Somebody stop him!
No, don't do it!
Bungee!
Very good. Very good.
You found us on the Internet? Jumpinggermans. Com?
No.
- McGruff? - To life!
McGruff.
- Look. My reasons were noble. - I trusted you.
L needed the scratch. What can I say? Please forgive.
- Three, two, one, bungee! - Bungee!
Need to put this tighter.
Oh, no, wait, wait, wait!
Are you crazy? What are you doing?
Get away from me. L'm jumping, and you can't stop me.
Bloody hell.
If you're scared, why do it?
Because the things you're scared of are usually the most worthwhile. Just a theory.
You know what? Actually, my dad taught me that.
Hold tight.
- God! - Oh, my Lord.
Hi.
Hello. Here we go.
L can't believe we just did that.
Check that out.
Holy crap.
Yeah, you'd better stay out there.
You know, we needed that money.
You guys got it all wrong.
L gave most of it back. Besides, that money was for love.
L've been traipsing over this stinking continent looking for a girl I've never met.
We made goo-goo eyes from, like, 30 meters.
But our eyes locked. We connected, which is next to impossible in this world.
You know that. You can't let a feeling like that pass you by.
You'd hug him all over again, wouldn't you?
L'm all right. L'm all right.
Just so you know, that's incredibly hot.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, hi, Gus Gus.
Gus Gus. So much of you they had to name you twice.
L thought you might need this.
- Thanks. - So...
Yes?
So...
No.
For a girl who claims to be terminally alone, you sure do get a lot of offers.
And rejections.
You're right.
You know what? L'm tired of living my life just in theory.
- I think I'm gonna go talk to Gus Gus. - Oh, come on.
You can't seriously be attracted to that walking...
...AIp.
L don't know.
L can see myself in the mountains, raising children...
...little Hans Hans and Gunther Gunther.
Anna, don't.
- Why not? - Because I don't trust him.
- I don't think he's good enough for you. - Yeah, right.
Because up until the last three days I was perfectly content with my life...
...of solitary adventure and then you came along...
Well, you came along and those two things seemed mutually exclusive.
Ben.
Can you ever just say what you really feel?
Okay, all right.
Because...
...l'm jealous as hell.
L'd hate to see you with Gus Gus. L'd hate to see you with another man.
Not only did I adore kissing you in Venice...
...but also because...
...l'm so un-bloody-hinged just being near you.
L guess you fixed it, huh?
Anna.
Calder.
- Where the hell have you been? - Listen, Weiss. She's here and she's safe.
We've been trying to reach you. Your orders changed.
What're you talking about?
Your assignment has been over since you jumped on that train to Venice.
- What? - Ben?
L'll be right there.
Okay.
L've gotta go, mate.
Bring her in immediately. We have a plan.
L promised I'd take her to the parade.
- Calder, listen to me. Listen. - I've got really bad reception here. L gotta...
Who was that?
Just some friends from Prague wondering where I am.
- He's gonna take her to the parade. - Well, I guess we're going to the parade.
What? What?
You did this for me, right?
- This? No, I didn't do it for you. What? - Really?
No, it was... I got tired of styling it, you know.
Okay.
Because it's kind of sexy.
- L'm sorry. Saw an opening, so I went for it. - Sorry. Yeah.
When we get Anna, I'm gonna put you in that tower.
You've been a very bad super-secret agent.
You've got cute morning hair.
You've got cute everything.
Hey, McGruff.
Wanna go to the Love Parade, see if mystery girl's there?
Rock on.
Sir. We just heard from Weiss.
Anna and Calder are going to the Berlin Love Parade.
- Get to Berlin. - Yes, sir.
Anna!
Hey! Oh, my God! Gabrielle, I never thought I'd find you.
You made it. L was so worried. Where were you?
You have no idea what it took us to get here.
- Do I know you? - My name is Scott Thomas McGruff.
L know how to make a woman feel like she's wearing laundry fresh out the dryer.
Gabrielle Le Clerc.
- He okay? - Yeah, yeah. Just hold on to your wallet.
Nice to meet you.
- McGruff, what about your mystery girl? - What girl?
- Okay, you are glowing. Sex? - No.
Love.
Weiss, I'll need at least an hour before you move in.
The president is not waiting an hour for his daughter.
- It's important to her. - I don't care.
L do, damn it. So stick to the plan.
L'll have her by the Victory Column in one hour.
Then this whole thing will be over and she'll be all yours.
What is going on? Who the hell...?
No, Anna. Just...
No!
You see a Victory Column somewhere around here?
Anna!
- Let me explain. - Get away from me.
- L'm Secret Service. - That is such bullshit.
L was outside the consulate when you ran.
L was in contact with Weiss and Morales the whole time.
- Oh, my God. - Your father gave you controlled freedom.
So I was his safety net.
And yours.
- You lied to me? - I know. L'm sorry. Jesus, I'm sorry.
- But something happened along the way. - No kidding, you asshole.
- You gotta believe me. - How can I believe anything at this point?
That's what I'm telling you. L didn't plan for it to happen, but it did.
L fell in love with you.
You can go to hell. You and my father both.
Anna.
This is Harper. We're flying over the Love Parade now.
Excuse me.
My grandmother throws better than you.
Sprechen sie English, punk? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Hey, where are you guys going?
Hey, watch it.
Hey, hey, hey. Look who that is.
- No. No way. - It's Anna Foster.
- It's Anna Foster, guys. - Hey.
- No. No, I'm not Anna, okay? - Where you going?
- Come on, Anna. Come on, precious. - Excuse me. You've got the wrong person.
You're a bit far from the White House.
- What you doing here? - I need to go.
- How about a date, babe? - Don't touch me!
- Wanna party? You're far from home. - Leave me alone. Just stop!
- Come on, Anna. - Good God.
- Hey, that's enough. Let's go. - Come on. Get out of my way. Who're you?
- Anna, let me help you get out of here. - Thank you so much.
Hey, you want some real fun? Come with us, sexy.
- Get away from me. - Come with us. She's a princess.
Anna, it's okay.
You're safe.
- You all right? - Come on, Anna. Let's go home.
Together we've been able to move this humanitarian effort forward.
This has taken the cooperation of all our allies.
But we are still confident that these programs will benefit...
How's your heart?
It's...
...a little bit broken.
Oh, Mom.
Something about a college campus. Isn't there, Morales? You know?
- What do you mean? - I mean, you know, the falling leaves...
...the promise of youth, the smell of curricula.
L'm thinking we probably gotta get new partners.
- L'm thinking I'm okay with that. - Yeah?
- That so? - Yeah.
- As long as your partner's an old fat guy. - I love old fat guys.
- You do too. You do. - I do.
- What? - You're so silly.
You think?
You guys are in love, huh?
- Yeah, I guess so. - It's amazing. L'm at this great school...
...and there's not one course on love.
You can't learn about love in a classroom. The dorms, maybe.
What? You can't learn about it in a classroom.
Love is not always that easy, Anna.
Nothing worth getting ever is.
Have you tried to get chili fries on this campus?
They sell chili. Oh, yes, and they sell the fries. But they cannot put the two together.
You got a building with engineering students...
...but they... - Just kiss me.
Okay.
Anna. Welcome home.
- Thank you. Happy holidays. - Thanks. And you.
Hey, Phil. Is he busy?
Not for you.
- New shades? - Yeah.
- Nice. Hey, Harper. New suit? - No.
Hey, Buddy! Hi, Buddy. How have you been? Hey.
- Hey, sweetie. - Hey, Daddy.
You look...
You look collegiate.
Thanks.
- How's school? - It's good. Yeah.
- Good. Am I in any textbooks yet? - No, not yet.
L hope you're taking some time to have some fun.
- You do? - Yeah.
Since when?
- Anna. - No, Dad. You know what?
L know why you were so protective. You didn't want me to get hurt...
...and you were right. L needed protection because people can't be trusted.
L have learned my lesson.
L didn't want you to learn that lesson.
Too late.
God.
L love this house at Christmas.
We miss you around here, Anna.
So have you given any more thought to that exchange study program at Oxford?
No, not really. Why?
Just always thought it was a great opportunity.
Yeah, I guess.
Okay, well, I'll leave you to it and I will see you at dinner.
- Do I smell cigar smoke? Dad. - No.
- Come on. - I don't think so.
- That's the story you're sticking with? - Don't tell your mother.
You remember Agent Calder?
Ben.
- Dad. - He's not an agent anymore. He quit.
- Really? - Yeah, he's living in London now.
Maybe he found something he's more passionate about.
Just a theory.
Yeah.
Thought you'd wanna know.
Okay.
Charlie, kill dimmer four and light one.
Yeah.
Hey, did you see who just walked in?
Have you seen who just walked in? That's the president's daughter.
There's Anna Foster.
What are you doing here?
L'm a big Puccini groupie.
L'm studying for a semester at Oxford.
L came to find you.
- You did? - Yeah.
L'm making the big gesture.
How did you know I was here?
L have connections.
- Oh, yeah. - Yeah.
- So you got a little thing for me, huh? - No.
Big thing.
- Lf I kiss you, do you think they'll shoot me? - No.
But I will if you don't.
- Please, can you help me get out of here? - Yeah, why not?
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